Monday, 17 February 2014

I took a week off booze

From Friday 7th of February, until Friday 14th, I decided to take a week off of booze. Initially I doubted myself. I was worried that I'd cave after a day, or at least a few days but I didn't.

The first few nights were quite difficult, to be honest. Especially being a weekend, where I'd normally go out for a few pints or at least have a few bottles at home but after the initial cleaning up period, I didn't even think about it.

Hell, I started thinking about beer negatively. Taking a week off made me ashamed and disgusted at myself, looking at all of my fellow beer geeks' check ins on untappd. Beer every single night for a lot of people. Usually multiples too. It was odd. Most weeks I'll have the occasional day off here and there and it's fine, but taking a week off really makes you think.

Add to that, the fact that I felt great. So clean and clear headed. It was awesome.

Still, I thought that when Friday struck I'd be really excited about having a few beers but I wasn't. I felt no special feelings towards it, and kinda felt that I didn't really want to drink at first. It was an odd experience, considering I obviously I love beer.

I wasn't going to go out at first. I figured I just couldn't be bothered. I was going to just head home and probably drink some Pepsi Max. Hell, when Moses first texted me inviting me to The Trafford Arms Valentine's beer festival, I originally said no. I wasn't feeling it. But then I decided that I needed to get out and socialise for a bit.

We got to the pub and had a beer, and I struggled to drink it. I was having a good time, but drinking at half the pace I usually do, which is half the pace others were drinking. I didn't like it at first. Even through my second beer, an old favourite, Thornbridge Wild Swan, it was difficult.

I think it was when I had my third beer of the evening I started enjoying drinking again. Two more beers followed after that and I thought it was great.

I got home and resolved to have another few days off because of how great I felt, but that didn't work out. I'd fallen back into the trap of enjoying drinking again. Saturday I went to Harper Wells to see Brian, and after a few samples I left with a bottle of wine. I then stopped in the city and had a couple of pints, before coming home and drinking that bottle of wine. I had failed, completely.

Sunday didn't change. I ended up having a few beers, and I hated myself. I didn't have many but I hated that I'd fucked up on my own resolution.

Tonight I am having a night off and I will on Thursday, Friday and maybe even continue from there. I need to stick to my rule of only drinking midweek when something important or different is happening. Like tomorrow night I will be in London for work and with that comes with a welcoming committee who want to have a few beers with me. That's all good. It's not like I'm just sitting at home necking beers alone. And Wednesday I will be sharing some Great British beers with my friends in Nekrogoblikon (which will bring another blog).

Just having a week off really got me thinking.... Why did I drink so much before? Was it out of sadness and anger? Was it that my friends and I basically don't do any kind of socialising that doesn't involve beer? Am I drinking less because I'm a lot happier?

At the end of the day, I feel happy with my decision to drink less. I like feeling clean and clear headed. It's not like I've quit drinking. I'll still have a few beers occasionally. I just want to feel good.

I will not fall into the trap again. Beer is not everything.

Nate

1 comment:

  1. http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk/

    The 12 steps are there for you, for when you decide to embark upon them.

    ReplyDelete